“Fatherhood has taught me that family is everything,” Lil Jon tells PEOPLE in this week’s issue as he prepares to release a new memoir

NEED TO KNOW

• Lil Jon is opening up about the state of his relationship with late son Nathan Smith at the time of his unexpected death in February
• “Fatherhood has taught me that family is everything,” the rapper and producer tells PEOPLE in this week’s issue
• Lil Jon’s new memoir, I Only Shout So You Can Hear Me, comes out on Tuesday, Oct. 20

Lil Jon’s relationship with his late son Nathan Smith was in a positive place before his death.

Months after Nathan unexpectedly died at age 27 in February, the 54-year-old rapper and producer (born Jonathan Smith) is opening up about their bond as he prepares to release a new memoir about his life and career, I Only Shout So You Can Hear Me, on Tuesday, Oct. 20.

At the top of 2026, Jon thought he’d finished writing the book. But after Nathan’s death, the Grammy winner channeled his grief into a new chapter. “I needed to share everything I was going through,” Jon tells PEOPLE in this week’s issue. “This book is dedicated to him now.”

Jon and his ex-wife Nicole Smith welcomed Nathan in 1998. He later followed in his father’s footsteps by pursuing music as DJ Young Slade. Together, the father and son collaborated on music and played live shows. “A lot of fathers don’t get to do that type of stuff with their sons,” he says. “I’m thankful for every day.”

In the book, Jon writes about time spent with Nathan in the recording studio and describes him as a “good-luck charm” for being there while he recorded the 2014 hit “Turn Down for What.”

Nathan later served as an engineer during some of Jon’s recording sessions, including the making of his 2024 Total Meditation album. “I could have easily got another engineer, but I’d rather be doing that with my son,” explains Jon. “We had so many good experiences in the studio.”

The father and son’s relationship went through ups and downs. Nathan was dealing with both physical and mental stress before his death, and Jon recalls having a “little back-and-forth” during their final in-person conversation.

After a therapy session, Jon called his son to apologize. “We had an amazing conversation, and basically I said I was sorry, and I was like, ‘You know what? I see you,’” he recalls. “He was just like, ‘Wow, thank you so much, Dad.’”

The call was the last time they ever spoke. Nathan went missing in early February and was found dead days later in a pond near his home in Milton, Ga. His cause of death was ruled accidental “drowning in the setting of psilocybin use.”

Three months later Jon had to go on tour. “I felt guilty for smiling and trying to be the life of the party, which is my job.” At the time, he adds, “I was crying a lot.”

However, Jon says, “I had a major breakdown in therapy recently. I realized I haven’t really given myself time to grieve grieve.” 

During his ongoing journey with loss, he takes comfort in his final interaction with Nathan. “I talked to his best friend after he passed,” he says. “[Nathan] was just so happy that I understood him at that time, and it made me feel at peace to know that he was so happy with our last conversation, that we were in such a good place.”

Right now Jon wants to be strong for his family, including daughter Nahara, 22 months, with his partner Jamila Sozahdah. “The No. 1 lesson I tell people now is, don’t feel like you can put something off for tomorrow, because you don’t know how much time you have with people,” he says. “Fatherhood has taught me that family is everything.”

Through his family, Jon finds the inspiration to keep going as he continues to mourn the loss of Nathan. “Seeing my daughter’s face and her smile just gave me some love. That’s really what you need in the time of grief,” he says. “Love helps you get through it.”

For more on Lil Jon, pick up this week’s issue of PEOPLE, available on newsstands everywhere Friday.

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